| | November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- | |
| |
Which story is the winner this month? | | Total Votes : 4 | | Poll closed |
| Author | Message |
---|
Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Wed Oct 28, 2009 12:58 pm | |
| The poll's been opened. I only have two stories, so we're a bit... Eh, in a bad position, but you can still vote. It's just that you're sure to get at least 30 points this time. xD Enjoy. Story #1. - Spoiler:
Chicago was going through a downpour, the streets a river of water. A man who obviously missed the forecast was caught directly in the middle of it, rushing home so as to not get sick and die. As he is running on the sidewalks, every second nearing home, something happened. Something from behind struck him in the head and he gets knocked out cold, blood lightly dripping from his head as he is dragged across the wet concrete. After what seemed like a dream that would never end, the man awakens within a dark room, cold, sore, and unable to move. His first reaction was of course sheer panic, struggling against what was holding him still. But it was no use. Trapped in this pitch black room for what seemed like hours, slowly breaking away the skin at his wrists from the struggle, a light is finally turned on. The light is blinding as his eyes adjust and he finally realizes where he is. He is in a sauna, with a man standing at the entrance. The other man has a table next to him, but he could not see what was on it because he was on the floor. The other man then smiles, for what reason he could not tell. The other man then begins to do something on the table, allowing him to get a good look of the man. He looked very casual, in a white shirt with black pants, his head a dirty mop of brown. His body was also very slim where as his face looked very stressed and old. The other man then slowly walks over to him as he kneels down in front of him.
“So... Do you know why you are here tonight?” replies the man, a grin still visible on his face. Trying his best to sound courageous but still shaking in absolute fear. “Wh- Who are you! Why am I here!”
“Ugh... Seeing as you don't know I'll have to go another night left in the dark...” replied the dark man, standing up and returning to his table. After a few seconds he returns with a few vials and a needle. Before he could even object the dark man had injected him with 2 shots. Slowly but surely the man went limp, not being able to move anything below his head. “Wh- What did you just do! I can't move!” yelled the man, hoping to attract someone from outside, his voice decreasing in power towards the end.
“Made my job easier. For one I paralyzed you for the next 24 hours, which is just enough time for me. But I also injected another drug into you, the name is not important, but now you can still feel pain...” As he says this he unties the man, feeling the marks the bindings made on his flesh. “Ugh... everyone is too eager to escape...” After he us completely untied the man positions him directly in the middle, his arms and legs separated to form an X. The dark man then walks out of the room again, but only for a moment. The man returned dragging chains behind him, all quite large. At this point the man on the ground could not speak, and couldn't move at all. But he still felt the pulse of pain at his wrists and ankles. The dark man takes his time when doing this, allowing the man to see every detail of his work. First he attached a chain to each corner, each of them ending in a sharp hook. The dark man is enjoying himself at this point, grabbing the first hook within his hand. When he could see the hook it looked deathly sharp and was stained with blood. He then pulls it toward the man's left hand, and thrusts it directly through the man's palm. A shock pain instantly pulses through him as he lets out a slightly muffled moan, that of which is supposed to be a cry of extreme pain. As his warm blood slowly drips out onto the cold ground. When he thought he couldn't bear the throbbing pain much longer the dark man had already reached his right hand, the other hook already in hand. Screaming within his own head the man pleads no, not wanting what's about to happen next. But of course it happens anyway. The 2nd hook is thrust into his right hand, the sharp pain now throbbing in both of his hands. At this point tears have already begun to form in his eyes. But the dark man had just begun, and after a quick lap of the blood that had already fallen he had the other 2 hooks in hand.
With one swift motion the dark man hooked both of the man's feet directly in the middle, pulling him off the ground and suspending him in mid air. As the man's blood slowly drains, the dark man slowly removes all of the other man's clothing. He then takes a carving knife off of his table as he walks to toward the middle of the man. Starting near his chest the dark man then begins to peel his skin with expert precision, taking extra precautions so as to not let him bleed out. This only aided in causing more pain... After what seemed like hours of pain, with hopes of passing out nowhere in sight, the dark man had finally finished in peeling off most of the top layer of his skin, even down to removing his eyelids. Along with this he removed a few other things to cause pain, such as removing all of his finger and toenails, and pulling out each and every one of his teeth. At this point this man is in a gruesome state, every inch of his body sensitive to even the smallest breeze. The dark man is enjoying this even further as he moves along the wall and hits a switch, turning the sauna to the hottest it could be. The heat was gradual but the effect was instantaneous. The man began to sweat so much from his exposed skin and the heat warmed the chains to such a point that his hands and feet began to burn from the hooks. But if this wasn't bad enough, the dark man begun to sprinkle salt upon the man, burning him even more as he is being dried as if he were jerky. As the man hangs there, drying in the intense heat, in more pain then any could imagine, the dark man stands at the foot of the door, laughing at the sight that he himself had created. “Aah if only you could remember what you had done to deserve this... Oh well...” the dark man then starts to leave but stops, rushing to the table,”Ah yes I had nearly forgotten, my employer had wanted me to do this as well as give you a message.” the dark man grabs what looks to be a rusty fork, and instantly thrusts it into the testicles of the man, draining his sperm onto the ground. Avoiding the mess he just created, the dark man walks over to his ear and says in a hushed voice. “Your wife did not die from a car crash... I killed her... As I said, I know people.” The dark man then walks out of the sauna, the body of the man still drying behind him.
A few days later he was found in that same position, the whole floor stained with blood... His body was found completely dried, his whole body deformed from the intense heat. He was in the obituaries the next day. It covered the death as intense 3rd degree burns on the job. Nobody took a second look at the death, and still to this day this dark man still travels the streets of Chicago. Killing any and all for the sheer joy of watching others in pain.
The End
Story #2. - Spoiler:
Dreams
Everyone has dreams, especially someone like me. Some people have dreams of a magnificent career. Some people have dreams of wealth beyond comparison. Some people have dreams of achieving something meaningful in their lives. As random or even childish a dream can be, every single person I met had had their dreams fulfilled, and the only exception would be my own unfulfilled Dream. I had this Dream since I was a teenager. I still had it throughout my school years in junior high, high school and even my college year. Later on in life, I held onto that Dream when I got my first job. When I met my wife and kids, I would still held onto that Dream of my. I would even hold onto that dream as I aged further and further. I loved my Dream; I love every part of it. I wanted my Dream since I was that just turning into a teenager, and I loved it still ever since it parted from my grasp and our reunion just recently was perfect.
My Dream was not something anyone can have; it was flawless and it would be unworthy for any mortal to even approach it. It had to be the perfect person with an amount of great status and that person can only be me. Only a person such as I can touch its immeasurable beauty and its dazzling aurora. It would be only days after I saw it again would I finally do something daring.
The moon was especially bright that day, it fact there was a full moon on that day. Their light ray beamed very strongly upon me, what was even stranger was that the outside world looked especially dark even with such strong moonlight. There were numerous situations where I looked outside and saw countless moths visible in that extreme dark, as if the moonlight only bothered to reflect onto them and myself.
I recalled that I sat in a diner as I enjoyed a decent meal and I was right next to the diner window in a corner. My meal had a really funny name, the manager called it “Cloud’s Last Meal”. What was ironic about the meal was that clouds gathered even with a full moon outside. The meal had comprised of a chicken breast and of course some fries and chips. What I didn’t like about this meal was that the breast tasted really funny, it churned my stomach. I guess that is what I get for something with a name as awful as ‘breast’.
Every since I met My Dream again, I followed it everyday. My Dream had visited this diner almost daily ever since I first visited here. When I did first visit the dinner, I was immediately rejoiced my Dream came into my life again but usually I would always feel a second of panic every time I saw it. However, as time went on, the feeling of panic diminished and diminished further.
“Excuse me; I’m here for the usual.” While I sat there, I paid attention to the conversation the cashier had with My Dream, barely being noticed that I eavesdropped on them. “Right away, I’ll be done in about ten minutes or so.”
Ten minutes, ten minutes to ready myself for what I have planned for this day. The next five minute of my life was filled with monstrous eating. I begin by switching seats so that I would face the wall instead of the cashier. I gobbled up my fries so fast that I was not eating it but it was piercing me. I used my knife and made cuts on my chicken breast repeatedly, it tasted really awful and only by slicing it up can I stand the awful taste.
“Here you go. Have a wonderful evening.”
I took my unfinished meal and threw it in the trash. I took my bag that I prepared for today for this important occasion. I would wait a bit before heading out and paid the cashier the money owed for the meal. “So what’s in the bag?” The cashier would say and I simply ignored him and went on my way. As I ranged the bell on my way out, I heard my own heart beat as the stress of my given situation was so extreme yet exciting.
My Dream was about a few yards in front of me. The streets were filled with cars and streetlights; I decided it was best that I waited till it was a more perfect place before I fulfilled my Dream. However, my legs frequently slowed down and shook given the stress I was in. Thankfully, about every few hundred paces I took, I felt more and more ease, eventually I felt natural. I would pass a few restaurants, shops, and houses on the way. Eventually, My Dream would head to the bridge leading to the other side of the city. The bridge was usually noted for being strange at random times. The water that passed under the bridge would have often been packed with water under it but today, there was just a small inch of water running below it.
The streetlight repeatedly shined on my Dream as it paced on the bridge. Its glory was magnificent and it was everything I saw all those years ago. It had a perfect height, a perfect width, a perfect length, a perfect form and a perfect shape. The shadow that my Dream diminished with every step it took, and then it would rise up only to diminish once more. I crept behind it very slowly, trying to not be heard. My every foot step was like a heart attack to me, agonizing and frightful. I would reach into my bag and pull out an object that would make me one with my Dream.
Using the object, I readied my hands as I crept behind my Dream. Then with all my strength, all my muscles, all of my energy, every living part of me, I extended my hands forward with the greatest amount of love I could for my Dream. I had to fulfill and satisfy my Dream with the best of my abilities.
My Dream orbited slightly and even turned around at my unprecedented love, I stared into the core of my Dream and as I looked, it would seem like a second in heaven for me. But it would then turn into hell as I felt a strange sense of terror from seeing my Dream in that moment and even more terrible as it collapsed right before me. The terror I felt mysteriously inflicted a sickness in me, my heartbeat pumping so fast that it was like a torturous echo.
Moments later, I realized it was not so terrible after all; I began to employ the next part of my perfect plan to fulfill my Dream. After I regained some consciousness in my brief unexplained illness, I dragged my Dream by its ends and down a hill filled with bushes not too far from where I was.
I once again, saw the river ran by at the bottom of the bridge, smooth yet calming. I could tell there was a lot of space under it for me and my Dream to spend some time together. I searched my bag and took out some very strong ropes. To ensure my Dream would not be damaged or accidentally spilt apart from my lovable grasp, I tightly tied the ropes on its four stems. Then just to be safe this was the perfect evening, I slammed the same object earlier on its two stems as hard as I could. There was a cracking sound, followed by a mysterious scream; it was at that point I knew I had done a good job so far.
I rested my giant Dream on my back and we went down to the space below the bridge. The water barely ran through it and there was a lot of open space for me to fulfill my Dream. It just me and my Dream together, there was no one else and no one would see what we were about to accomplish, it was completely isolated.
Unfortunely, the bridge presented me with blindness, it would have made no difference If I closed my eyes or not. I reached into my bag and turned on a dim flash light so no one would notice, but it was still very dark and I could barely see anything at all. Though I could see My Dream tried to fidget and break loose, but with its bottom two stems damaged; My Dream would have no chance of escaping from my grasp. All of a sudden, the belt that I had tightened became lose. My lower clothing that shielded me from evil was gone, I was bare to be warped and I couldn’t believe my own hands had ripped off something. I knew it was time to finally achieve my Dream. Approaching my dream with a both frightened and frightening expression, I fulfilled my Dream like I always wanted to do. I fulfilled it like there was no tomorrow. I fulfilled it to make myself and my Dream complete as destiny meant for this day to happen. It was wonderful, it was magnificent, and everything I done up to this point could not even match up to the happiness and pleasure I felt at this moment. I was human but now I am God. No, I’m not god. I am greater than God.
“Why do this?” I thought I had heard something in my moment of pleasure and I silenced all possible voices with a threat. This was not the time for anything to be in control of me but it was my time to control everything I want.
I was done with my Dream. My lifelong ambition had been fulfilled. The ever moving structure of my Dream carried only the appearance of my love. “Now, thanks, this is the last time we’ll be together. I hope you enjoyed it.” I would say to my Dream. I would thank it again for the pleasure it given me. Namely, its relaxation, its love, and its peacefulness, not only that, I finally felt fulfilled in my life and received my own self-realization.
As alive as my Dream was, I decided it was a simply an obstacle in my life now. It was an evil that if not stopped, would warp and destroy me one day. It was an art piece that had gone bad, it had its moment of fame but now it was time to remove this art piece from the museum of my world. I reached into my bag and pulled out an important item, a jagged tool. The jagged tool could be barely seen in the dark; I touched its edge with my fingertips and accidentally cut myself, it was the perfect sharpness that I would need.
I saw deformities this art piece had received, I plunged my jagged tool repeatedly at where I felt it was flawed. I plunged at its four corners and the stems that held it together countless times. In fact the more I tried to purify this art piece; I felt I was only added to its monstrosity, what I was doing was not enough. I had an idea and acted upon it as a last resort, I completely ripped off the protective shielding of this art piece and plunged my jagged tool as hard and as fast I could into the centre of its bottom two stems.
I tried and tried to perfect this art piece but it barely made a difference. All I did was cover my own face and my Dream with gallons of red paint. I realized eventually the red paint everything meant I could not make it better; all I did have deformed it more and more. The only way was to cleanse the art piece with God’s gift, and that was to completely destroy it. Feeling that I been presented with God’s will to this art piece, I spilled oil all over My Dream, took out a matchstick, sparked it and set the art piece aflame.
Suddenly I felt ill again, like everything inside me was all wrong. My eyes became my ears and my ears became my eyes. My eyes could only see of suffering and destruction, and there was only sorrow and pain engulfed me. As dark this was, it was exactly what I wanted and more. I could feel only delighted as it was the greatest thing I ever saw. Then all of a sudden, the suffering and destruction would slowly fade away until I was completely blind. During this, my ears could only hear the echo of my cleansing, which fire that would cleanse this dreadful art piece. Then, I heard my fire faded and faded further, my deaf ears were once again my eyes and my eyes were once again my deaf ears. As for my Dream, it was completely still and was simply a disgusting black blob of its former self. I hoped deeply that God punished this art piece as I had.
Even though I was deaf, I began to hear incessant noises; my eardrums have burst from that noise. The sound of the chicken I have ate just before screamed loudly in my ears, cuckoo-cuckoo-cuckoo. Unable to endure the noise anymore, I moved eccentrically to drown out the noise, up and down, down and up, up and down, down and up, right to left, left to right, right to left, left to right.
Rotated and straggled. Rotated and straggled. A massive yellow pie, Styx, my charred Dream, my bag, my charred Dream, Styx, , the same massive yellow pie, the garden, Styx, my dream, my horribly charred Dream, MY LONG-LOST DREAM. I could never forget you!
The last thing before I passed out was the sight of a massive white box with flashing red and blue light. I only remembered I had been swarmed by predatory blue polygons.
So this isn't Nanowrimo, but it's our very own seen-a-thousand-times writing contest! We will be having new contests every month or two, and everybody can vote for their favorite story once they're all submitted. Deadline: 22 November 2009. Votes: Poll closes 28th November, so be sure to vote. This month's theme is... HorrorIt doesn't need to be completely horror, it can involve any element as long as it features a scene that makes your skin crawl. It can be pretty much anything from that point on. Preferable word count is between 1,5K and 2,5K words. PM me your stories, they will be posted when the deadline of 22st Nov. is reached. Winner will recieve 50 points, second place will recieve 30. Third place and following will not recieve any points for thier position althought you get 10 points for participation. You may begin right now.
Last edited by KyKai on Sun Nov 22, 2009 7:01 pm; edited 3 times in total | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Oct 29, 2009 6:14 pm | |
| Nobody's joining, I take it? | |
| | | bestdragon3 Venus
Posts : 1116 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-22 Age : 31
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Oct 29, 2009 8:18 pm | |
| Make it a Scary/Creepy/Disturbing short story writing contest. But it doesn't exactly have to be a story, it can just be a scene that they write that makes their skin crawl^^ | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Oct 29, 2009 8:27 pm | |
| | |
| | | bestdragon3 Venus
Posts : 1116 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-22 Age : 31
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Oct 29, 2009 9:06 pm | |
| | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Oct 29, 2009 10:37 pm | |
| Don't rush yourself, lol. The deadline is the twenty-second and I have about... well... a lot of stuff to write, personally. xD | |
| | | bestdragon3 Venus
Posts : 1116 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-22 Age : 31
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Oct 29, 2009 10:59 pm | |
| So do I actually, I have a book and Nanowrimo to participate in lol. But I actually have it already written^^ Pming now. | |
| | | Nokiemens Mars
Posts : 527 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 29 Location : Wandering the streets.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Fri Oct 30, 2009 4:46 pm | |
| o-o ill write summin i guess. got nuffin better to do really | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Sat Oct 31, 2009 12:37 pm | |
| Okay. Ideally I'll need one last person. | |
| | | power_of_ghost Mars
Posts : 648 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-16 Age : 32
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Sat Oct 31, 2009 5:36 pm | |
| | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Sat Oct 31, 2009 10:03 pm | |
| Oh, that's great!
I won't be participating this month, though. I've been having a writer's block since forever and I'm too busy trying to complete unfinished experiments. | |
| | | bestdragon3 Venus
Posts : 1116 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-22 Age : 31
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Sat Oct 31, 2009 10:29 pm | |
| Ugh I know what your feeling lol. Worst of all I have that writing contest tomorrow lol. | |
| | | Nokiemens Mars
Posts : 527 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 29 Location : Wandering the streets.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Mon Nov 09, 2009 5:11 pm | |
| >< writers block... all my ideas suck. | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Mon Nov 09, 2009 5:12 pm | |
| You might consider brainstorming. I know it's a pain in the ass but it gives you the best ideas, sometimes. | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Nov 19, 2009 4:21 pm | |
| Topic bumped:
Remember, guys, you have only three days left before I stop accepting short stories and open the poll. I have only recieved 2 up to date, and I preferrably need 2 more. | |
| | | Nokiemens Mars
Posts : 527 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 29 Location : Wandering the streets.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Fri Nov 20, 2009 7:25 am | |
| Bah! x_x im gonna have to drop out... not able to think at all these days. And never EVER fart in a space suit. | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Sun Nov 22, 2009 7:02 pm | |
| | |
| | | power_of_ghost Mars
Posts : 648 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-16 Age : 32
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Sun Nov 29, 2009 10:20 pm | |
| | |
| | | bestdragon3 Venus
Posts : 1116 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-22 Age : 31
| | | | power_of_ghost Mars
Posts : 648 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-16 Age : 32
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Mon Nov 30, 2009 12:16 am | |
| lol i got the idea of my story from what i wanted to do to this girl i hated | |
| | | bestdragon3 Venus
Posts : 1116 Reputation : 1 Join date : 2009-08-22 Age : 31
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Mon Nov 30, 2009 12:55 am | |
| I got my story idea from a friend of mine. I used this same story as my ticket into a horror roleplay forum. Now, mines not really horror, it's just freaking creepy lol. | |
| | | Gort the mighty Mercury
Posts : 417 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-10-06 Age : 28 Location : Roleplaying on your face
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Wed Dec 02, 2009 10:12 pm | |
| | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Dec 03, 2009 6:34 pm | |
| Which reminds me, I need to update this for December. | |
| | | Gort the mighty Mercury
Posts : 417 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-10-06 Age : 28 Location : Roleplaying on your face
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Dec 10, 2009 7:17 pm | |
| you gonna update or what? | |
| | | Hinaoki Mars
Posts : 556 Reputation : 0 Join date : 2009-08-14 Age : 27 Location : Lost between the shockwaves.
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- Thu Dec 10, 2009 8:30 pm | |
| Finally, I think I'll wait until January... o.o | |
| | | Sponsored content
| Subject: Re: November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- | |
| |
| | | | November's Short Story Contest -Winner gets 50 points- | |
|
Similar topics | |
|
| Permissions in this forum: | You cannot reply to topics in this forum
| |
| |
| |